07-21-2007
Response & Tech Difficulties
Loving Annie wrote:
Good Friday morning and Thank you for answering, Lucid!
I still cannot read your comments page AT ALL. It is still in very dark blue on my screen. I do not know how to fix this, or again, if it is only happening to me.
I just want MLW to forgive me, understand why I did what I did with compassion and appreciate the fact that I stepped up to the plate to help him financially when the chips were down rather than having his pride offended.
And then let it go. So that we can have peace between us.
I would do anything to have things be right between us, without anger or pain or resentment or distance.
To have him willing to try to meet me halfway, for there to be joy between us, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually and physically…
I truly adore(d) him. And think we have much to offer each-other.
I hate to think that there was something valuable and fragile there with promise, and that after 3 years of hoping, I ruined it with my co-dependent impulsiveness…
I too think I am on the brink of some big changes in my life… Please send me blessings for that. May they be positive and life and heart-affirming…
And I am learning/will try to not manipulate, and to let things be as they are meant to be…
And I wish good things for you, too, Lucid, only good things.
Genuinely,
Loving Annie
Lucid’s Thoughts:
Hi Loving Annie! Thank you for responding and sharing your personal life and feelings with us. I am sure there are others who can relate with some of your emotions, and that is the whole purpose here. To live, learn, heal, and grow together!
Blessings for your situation. It does seem some things were left with no closure; one being your pained heart! I see that you also wish he could see your angle, and understand why you did what you did; this may never happen unfortunately.
Maybe it is forgiveness that you are in search for. If he is not willing to give it to you, then you must forgive yourself for whatever it is that you feel you did wrong, but don’t let him use your need to his advantage ok!
Thank you again and God Bless!

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July 22nd, 2007 at 2:29 am
My terminal is acting fine. Maybe there is a hold up with the servers for the affilates co’ you have on here.
I have high speed internet. I don’t know if that matters.
Relationships are so difficult aren’t they! Hopefully you will be happy in the end!
Sending thoughts.
July 22nd, 2007 at 5:11 pm
Randy - I have high speed too so I don’t know…..
You are right, relationships are quiet complex, but that’s what makes it so appealling. It is a challenge, it is refreshing, it makes us feel alive…..
July 23rd, 2007 at 4:36 pm
Somtimes it is hard to let go, but adventually you will heal no matter how big the wound. I just broke up with my fiance. Every other moment I feel like I am going to have a nervouse breakdown. My decision was hard but I knew it had to be done. Sometimes things cant always be the way you want them to be or how you plan them. Remember it might not only be your plan.
July 24th, 2007 at 3:37 am
Hello Danielle, sorry to hear of your break up!!! You do have a good point, and it is true, change allows for opportunitues. Maybe you had to go through what you did in order to get to where you are today.
I hope things work out for you, and thank you for sharing your story! God Bless!